Thursday, August 19, 2010

1936

It was in this year that my brother returned. My last day began like anyother, with a cup of morning orange juice and Jack. As I sat and sipped, I contemplated where my existence was going anymore. All of my family had deserted me due to my chronic alcoholism, and I was forced to move away from them forever. Not once did I find a friend or family member who understood me for who I was, even before I began drinking. You know that kid who would be tied up in his mind while picking at woodchips at the far end of the playground? That wasn't exactly me. No mold could be quite cast for me. Like a conglomerate stone, I was walked on by many, underapreciated, but yet I could still blend in most places because I had a little bit of everything in me. This still holds true today. The Oscar Erstwhile from 1916 is the same in '36, befriending none, but never regarded enough to be disliked. But back to today. I did not believe that I would be melting Alaska on this day, but the arrival of my brother at my Watershed apartment on the 6th floor signaled a rip in the continuum. "Hello there, Oscar," was all Jozef greeted me with. Being myself, I did not invite him, even after such pleasantries. Of course, he shoved his way into my dim habitat, with no more than the greeting. It was not until after he finished my Juice and Jack that he began to speak again. "Still on this stuff, eh?" Jozef attempted. I nodded, but gave him no more than such, I was still in a bit of shock from seeing my brother after age 10. However, this was not the same Jozef that I knew from before. He was older, but not wiser. An angry look in his eye sounded alarms in my head, but he just went on to run through my apartment, without my protest, no matter how much I wanted to scream and tell him to leave. He returned back to me, standing in the living room, looking at me as if I was dumb. "Can you not speak to me Oscar? I sought you out because the family has not seen or heard from you in 10 whole years. Do you not think that this has been a burden for us? You never seemed to fit in with us, but you were family all the same," Jozef attempted once more, "SPEAK TO ME!!!" At this point the anger was flaring up as physical heat from his body, and he turned and pulled a knife from his hip, engraved with the words "Silver in Snow" in its hilt. As he rushed towards me, for one of the only times in my life, I felt fear. Fear that I might be at an end to what felt like an endless rambling of 1936 days. As the knife slashed through the air, I could no longer see my brother, only black, with a strong gust of wind pulling me forward into the gape.